From on High

I retort. You decide.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

PRE-sidential Press Conference

So anybody can analyze a press conference after it's taken place. More fun, I think, is to guess what the man himself will say just before. To that end, here are my pre-sidential predictions on how Bush will phrase his answers to a few key questions when he goes on the air in just 15 mins. We'll compare my predictions to the actual afterwards....

On charges of cronyism....

"...As to the charges of so-called cronyism, (insert reporter name here),....that is, the idea that somehow Harriet Miers isn't....qualified because she happens to work in the White House....The fact is that's simply not true...The American people are gonna see that Harriet is a top rate legal mind....I have worked with Ms. Miers. I've come to know what a sharp and....careful legal mind she she........Lemme just say that the reason I picked Ms. Miers is because she's the kind of person who interprests the law not makes the law. And that's what I look for when I'm looking for a judge or a justice....someone who's not going to, you know, legislate from the bench. And the American people are gonna see that, just like I saw it in the years I've worked with Ms. Miers.

On charges of gender affirmative action....

"(insert reporter name here), the fact is anybody who knows me knows I'm not a fan of litmus tests...I don't judge nominees on the basis of one factor, one..qualification...That goes for opinions on cases like Roe and that goes for other qualifications as well. I don't use a so-called "gender litmus test" or a "race litmus test". In other words, I don't use a test that says if you're a woman, or if you're black, you've got a better shot at being the next justice. I evaluate people based on their qualifications. I am also mindful, (insert reporter name here), that diversity is an important thing, a wonderful thing, that we have here in America. I am proud to nominate one of the most accomplished women and lawyers this country has....But you see, I interviewed and considered potential nominees from all kinds of backgrounds...all walks of life. And I picked the one I thought would do the job best. I'm confident the American people are gonna see why I made that decision real soon".

On Katrina....

"We just got hit with not one, but two of the most devastating hurricanes in our history. I toured the region three times and I saw the devastation...lives destroyed and cities and towns ruined. And, you know, hindsight is 20-20. When we look back, are there things that coulda gone better? You bet. A ca-ta-stro-phe of that mag-ni-tude is somethin you can never totally plan for. And so, what I told the Congress and my staff is that we're gonna see what we need to do to get it right if - God forbid - anything like that happens again. We're gonna see where we did wrong and where we did right and make changes accordingly. And that will help us prepare not only for'll help us prepare for like terrorists attacks and other disasters. And lemme just say, that we've already seen the positive results of our looking back. We saw with hurricane Rita how an effective federal response can complement state authorities. And that's our help the states when they need it."

Thank you, and God bless you.


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